I hate wobbly tables!

As someone who loves and appreciates pure mathematics, it is all together satisfying and refreshing when I can point to a proof that has life changing implications and say, “See, math really does help you in real-life!” In fact, I can think of a time, just the other day when having had this mathematical proof, I might have had a more relaxing lunch.

Have you ever sat down at a restaurant and noticed that the table wobbles gently from side to side. Maybe your beer slides recklessly away from you every time your dining partner leans his elbows on the table. Well, suffer no more; mathematics has come to your rescue.

This problem has been intuitively solved by beer drinkers and mathematicians for years. First, you can just stuff a few beer coasters under one leg and hopefully get the wobble down to a minimum. You can also just turn the table around until it stops wobbling. This second option has been mathematically proven as the perfect option. Burkard Polster of Monash University in Australia (it would be an Aussie!) proved that any rectangular table with four legs of equal length has to sit flat, meaning with all four feet touching, on the floor at some point (as long as there are no places where the floor slopes more than 35 degrees; and who wants a floor that slopes like that anyway?) So, to solve your wobbly problems, all you have to do is turn the table around the center of the table until you find the sweet spot. Unfortunately, this doesn’t mean that that the table top is going to be flat! But at least it isn’t moving anymore. Personally, I am really looking forward to trying this out. Intuitively it makes sense, and it could be a pretty good party trick, if you are hanging around with a bunch of dorks like me.