Dresses, and Jewlery, and Shoes, Oh my!

I never thought that buying a wedding dress would be emotionally scarring. It is supposed to be such an exciting and wonderful day. However, I made the mistake, and how was I to know, of starting my search at a bridal boutique called Divas (located on Lawndale across the street from the Target). I made an appointment on Friday afternoon for a Saturday fitting at 10:30am. I was extremely nervous and my friend Aimee came along to offer moral support and to take pictures of the gowns I liked. Thank god she was there. It started out poorly. We walked in and I announced I had an appointment. The lady looked annoyed to have to help anyone. She pointed us to a wall of dresses and told us to pick a few out to try. She asked me about my budget and when I responded she walked away. She came back a minute later and said

“Um, I don’t think you are going to be able to find anything in that range here.”

I was a little annoyed by her tone, but was determined to have a nice day.

“Well, I am here, can I at least try a few things on and maybe I will find something I want to splurge on.”

“That’s fine,” she said. And carried a few dresses into the dressing room for me to try on. The dresses were heinous. She hadn’t really looked at me or talked to me to figure out what I liked and the few she picked out were awful. But I tried them on anyway because all of the bridal magazines say you will be surprised when you find your dress. It may not have been what you were looking for. They were still heinous. Aimee had to help me get in and out of them, as the weight and tricky buttons, zips, straps, etc were bewildering.

Finally, I picked out a dress that was just beautiful. I looked at the tag and it was $2899.00. At this point I was starting to feel a little depressed. What if I never find another dress that I like as well? How was I to pay for this? What if I ran out of time? It didn’t help that the ladies at the shop were pressuring me and making me feel bad.

“Oh, you really waited until the last minute. You will have to pay a rush fee to get the dress here on time.”

“Is there anyone you can call to get the extra money to pay for it?”

“You know if you just serve hotdogs at your reception you might be able to use the extra money to buy this dress.”

“You want to look beautiful at your wedding. It really is all about the dress.”

I left there feeling anxious, fat, poor and thoroughly bummed. So Aimee and I went to Target and shopped and I felt better, but when she suggested going to try more dresses on I was against it. I just didn’t want to be treated that way again.

We got back to my house a few hours later and I decided to make an appointment at David’s Bridal for the next day. I had been in there before and had not been impressed. But at this point I was starting to get nervous about “running out of time!”

The next morning my friend Chris joined me with the camera ready and we headed to David's Bridal. We were greeted by a friendly lady who took my information. Then Latora, my personal wedding dress helper met me and we began to pick out dresses. I picked out three and she picked out one. She carried the four gowns (about 30 pounds worth of fabric) to the dressing room and I knew instantly that this was going to be a different experience. She told me to pick out some shoes off the back wall, and she picked out a bustier and a slip and helped me into them all. Then she helped me put on each dress. She said,

“Put your arms up into the air. Now dive into the dress. You have to dive into these things.”

So I literally dived forward into the dress, arms together like an Olympic diver, as she threw the layer of fabric back over my body. It was actually really fun, and diving really is the best way to get into those things.

We tried on dresses, and veils, and jewelry and chatted about our soon to be foreign in-laws (she is marrying a man from Liberia in July) and tattoos, and other fun stuff. Chris took pictures and was wonderful in her honest critique of each dress. It was the second dress, and the one Latora had picked out incidentally, that was the dress I picked in the end. It is so beautiful and I love it.